TESTC 06

The Evil Scientist Is Too Competent – Episode 6

While Eight was buried in headaches over new research and the mass production of the stamina potion, Regalia sat staring at the sample vial on her desk, humming softly.

“Hm… so this is the potion Galeum praised so highly…”

At first glance, it looked no different from a regular energy tonic or fatigue-recovery drink. She even stuck her tongue out for a taste—flavor-wise, it wasn’t particularly special either.

So what secret could this potion possibly be hiding, that it had restored Galeum to his prime? Determined to find out firsthand, Regalia tilted back her head and downed the potion in one gulp.

The amount was small enough that even her dainty mouth could empty it easily. Smacking her lips at the refreshing lemon flavor, she tilted her head in puzzlement when nothing seemed to happen.

Nothing?

If it really restored Galeum to his prime, surely something unusual should’ve happened to her too—maybe not on his level, but at least a burst of hero-like strength or something.

But strangely enough, nothing at all happened. At best, it felt no different than drinking an average energy drink.

Thinking she might’ve been tricked by Galeum and Eight, Regalia nevertheless sent the potion sample off to corporate researchers for analysis. Maybe its secret lay hidden in the composition.

“—President, we’ll need your signature on these documents.”

“Mm. Bring them here.”

After that, she buried herself in work, forgetting all about the potion. The only thing she noticed was that she felt unusually refreshed and free of fatigue—but wasn’t that normal after any decent energy drink?

It wasn’t until that night that Regalia realized something was off.

Dinner, bath, light exercise—finished. As always, she lay down in bed at exactly 10 p.m. She never broke this routine, believing that going to bed early and waking early was essential for proper growth.

Naturally, she should’ve fallen asleep the moment her head hit the pillow. But this time, her body flatly refused to feel tired. Her mind remained clear and restless.

“…This is bad.”

Sensing she wouldn’t be able to sleep, Regalia shut her eyes and began counting sheep to pass the time. By the time she’d counted around 28,000 of them, dawn had already arrived.

She hadn’t slept a wink.

Regalia went to work bright-eyed and alert anyway.

The next night, she counted again. And again. This time she got to a million sheep before realizing she still hadn’t fallen asleep.

.

.

“Uooooooohhh!”

“My fatigue—my fatigue is vanishing!”

“I feel like I could stay awake for three days straight…!”

The stamina potion Eight had brewed was distributed to all members of the organization. They downed it whenever they were tired, or right before heading into battle.

Its effects were tremendous. Just as Regalia had stayed wide awake for three days without issue, so too did the rank-and-file feel their weary bodies flood with vitality.

In fact, the combatants were now strong enough to rival, or even overpower, many C- and D-rank heroes. Considering that their fighting ability had previously been little better than trained civilians with clubs, this was nothing short of miraculous.

And of course, the greatest beneficiary was Galeum. The potion had originally been made specifically for him, after all—naturally, he gained the most from it.

“Wahahahaha! Come at me, brats!”

Weapon in hand, Galeum clashed with heroes head-on. Those who remembered how, until recently, he’d barely been able to fend off even rookie heroes, could only gape at the overwhelming force behind his strikes.

“Why the hell is that beast bastard so strong now!?”

“I don’t know! And Red, watch your mouth—that’s a racial slur!”

“Is now the time for that!?”

“You seem to have plenty of energy left… Then I’ll take it up a gear!”

“AAAAAARGH! You crazy bastard!!”

Galeum didn’t bother correcting them that as a tiger beastman, he was closer to a cat than a dog. Instead, he swung his weapon all the harder—until they stopped calling him a mutt.

As expected of a veteran of countless battlefields, his martial skills had long since reached the realm of a master. In terms of sheer lethality, he was even more fearsome than many acknowledged masters.

For a while, the heroes endured his onslaught. But then an alarm beeped from Galeum’s pocket. He immediately stopped mid-swing.

“Mm. Quitting time. I’ll be leaving now.”

“Y-you crazy bastard! It’s only 3 o’clock, you villain!”

“Your work hours are none of my concern. I’m clocking out.”

With that, Galeum withdrew, dragging his fallen subordinates with him. The heroes wanted to pursue, but couldn’t. They hadn’t managed to stop him even when he’d fought them fairly—and truth be told, it had felt like he was holding back. He easily could have killed them, but hadn’t.

Chasing an opponent like that would’ve been suicide. Heroes weren’t supposed to throw away their lives—they were supposed to subdue villains.

So they let the villains retreat, returning to HQ with bitter complaints instead.

“Ugh! Director! Can’t we just arrest that beast bastard already!?”

“No.”

“What do you mean, no!? We know who he is, we know which organization he belongs to, we even know where their base is!”

Just storm the place and capture him, right? Red couldn’t understand why not.

The director sighed.

“Not even the President could walk in there.”

“…What?”

“That entire city is private property of the Evils Corporation. Every building, every car, every street—the citizens living there are all essentially leasing from Evils. Most of them are employees of the company or its subcontractors.”

“…But—they’re villains! They could hurt civilians!”

“Villains who send advance notices of their attacks down to the minute? Most of those ‘civilians’ are employees, remember. When an evacuation order goes out, they’re happy—they get time off work.”

Red’s jaw dropped at the absurdity of it all. What kind of situation was this? It felt like…

“…This is just kids’ make-believe.”

“Say that out loud and people will call you spoiled.”

“…Why?”

“Because it’s still better than cities where villains run wild, shoot heroes’ families in the head, or where incomprehensible alien monsters attack. You want a transfer to one of those places?”

“…No, sir. I was wrong.”

Reality sank in. Even if it didn’t make sense, he could at least understand: better a villain playground with rules than indiscriminate slaughter.

In fact, villain-related deaths in this city were less than a tenth of those elsewhere.

“The job isn’t to overthink. Just subdue and arrest them on the field. Fortunately, no one complains about that much.”

“…But sir, didn’t that beast bastard seem way too strong? Was he always like that—”

“Red.”

“…Sorry. That villain bastard.”

The director pulled something from his pocket and showed it to Red.

It was a canned drink.

“Evils Corporation’s latest product. An energy drink.”

“…And?”

“Our scientists analyzed it. It’s diluted to maybe one ten-thousandth of the real thing, but even so, it outperforms every energy drink on the market. The price-performance ratio is absurd.”

A high-performance drink from a corporation run by villains.

A villain officer who suddenly got monstrously stronger.

Only an idiot wouldn’t connect the dots.

“…We need to find the scientist who made this.”

“And if we do?”

“Try to recruit him, somehow.”

Neither the director nor Red sounded confident. Whoever could brew something like this… Evils could always outbid them.

.

.

“—Achoo!”

“A-are you all right…?”

“Ah, yeah. Just a sudden chill.”

I wiped my nose and glanced at Aile, who had come all the way to my lab. For someone so gloomy she could barely speak her mind, showing up here meant she had a serious reason.

And I was right.

“I-I heard from the boss. That you’re going to make me a tool…”

“Yes. Do you already have something you use normally?”

“Ah, n-no… I only joined the organization to fight magical girls…”

“Hm. So I can just make whatever I want?”

“…Anything’s fine?”

Her eyes lit up. For once, she didn’t stammer.

“I—I want tentacles.”

“…What?”

“Tentacles. You know, like in magical girl doujins?”

…Oh, I knew.

I stared at her, dumbfounded.

And she stared back, deadly serious.

My head already hurt.